Rhyme.

Overgrown weeds, 

Scarce misdeeds,

Juvenile & naive. 

Consistency skewed

Blue & purple bruise,

A lifelong love for misuse.

Bitter, clear taste,

Anxious of waste,

Anger & fear misplaced.

Words are very few

Apologies long overdue,

Peace & acceptance is new.

Every few years,

A brand new fear

Blinds & then it clears.

Words too hard to find,

Haunting to the mind,

It’s easier forcing it to rhyme.

Back with a draft

Photo by Francesco Ungaro on Pexels.com

Introduction of post: Happy Friday! In previous posts and podcast episodes I’ve shared on this blog, I’ve talked about the different steps everyone can take in order to write their first fiction story. I have also discussed some ideas for fiction stories that I wanted to pursue.

After taking a long break from this website and writing in general, I have decided to completely switch gears with the fiction story I had been planning. I thought the best way to share my idea would be to write it in the form of a draft and share it. My ideas are far from finalized, and I am completely open to constructive feedback on my draft at this point.

I just wanted to be able to add a space on my website where I can start to develop my ideas for fiction stories and start to develop a routine posting schedule again.

Name of story: Grey?

Setting: Starts in New Orleans, Louisiana. Typical two-story home in a quiet area. Working middle-class family and upbringing. Then shifts to an abandoned warehouse building with magical/supernatural elements. Meaning even though it’s a warehouse building, it transforms into a dark, poorly lit environment that is constantly changing for the rest of the story. The image of the room constantly shifts into different mazes and images, depending on what the female main character and “narrator” are talking about. The abandoned warehouse is related to the aftermath of hurricane Katrina. The story doesn’t revolve around the aftermath of Kartina at all, but it does have a quiet, strong presence because it adds to the main question/theme of the story,

Theme: Which is “Can you label something as completely bad or completely good?” The main character is scared that she’s not a good person on the inside, but everyone thinks she is on the outside because she presents herself in a way that checks off the boxes of what mainstream society would consider a good person.

Setting Continued: Then the majority of the story takes place in a sort of maze the main character will walk through. She walks on a dirt path in a rural, wooded area, but will encounter different buildings that look completely out of place along the way. Ex. An NYC Penthouse, a small cottage, a shopping mall. The environment she stumbles in depends on what scenario each supporting character presents to her.

What season is it?: Fall, leading into winter

Music: Jazz & Hip-hop, street performers

Entertainment: Mardi Gras, festivals, a large mission trip with churches there to help with the aftermath of Katrina (which further contributes to the theme of good vs. bad).

Characters:

Main character: Name- Cristal- The Greek meaning of this name means “pure of heart” which is significant b/c even though her biggest fear is that she is a bad person & that she has hurt several people in her life, she doesn’t realize how pure-hearted she truly is to her core. 

Age: Mid-twenties (25)- subject to change

Hobbies: Art- drawing & painting, volunteering at an animal shelter, loves to play soccer, loves to watch football, loves to go out to bars & clubs with her small group of close friends & boyfriend, loves spending quality time with family & playing board games with parents

Pets?: Yes, one cat.

How she interacts with others: She’s extremely polite & respectful, people pleaser, charming, people find her compelling, oblivious to her own beauty, vulnerable, easy to take advantage of. People constantly underestimate her own self-awareness. She’s strategic. She is working on building self-confidence. She’s extremely intelligent. She is aware people are taking advantage of her sometimes but goes along with it, because the most important thing to her is that she is a nice person, despite the hardships she has faced in the past.

She is an excellent listener, she’s a bit naive, she was semi-sheltered throughout her childhood. People find her sweet, endearing, slightly childish but also extremely mature. She is confusing to people. They look at her with a watchful eye because the major shifts in her personality can come across as though she’s being disingenuous and hypocritical if you didn’t truly know her.

How does she react to being put under pressure?: She has a lot of anxiety. She reaches a boiling point & gets extremely emotional. She takes everything personally, even when it’s not about her. She spreads herself too thin. She shies away from conflict. She sacrifices her own happiness to make others happy. She feels like a complete failure when she can’t solve a task that was always going to be impossible for her to complete successfully. When she hurts/disappoints other people, fails to measure up to other people around her who had way more handouts than she did, she feels like a complete failure and doesn’t think she has a purpose. When she is under too much pressure, her mental health drastically spirals.

Narrator: Name- Basar, it means “sight, vision, the eye”, Arabic origin. His character is the only one with magical elements/powers. He can create visions that feel like reality to Cristal, but they are completely fabricated. She is physically safe for the entire story, even though at some points she feels like Basar has put her in real danger. He knows she feels this way, but secretly ensures her safety is always protected, pulling back slightly every time he notices that she is at her breaking point.

He is a trickster. He is all-knowing. He was mortal in his initial lifetime. He had a troubled childhood. He has done this journey with other people before, but he really sees himself in Cristal. Cristal makes him feel nostalgic and secretly touched that she is such a kind person who is so troubled by the thought she might be bad. He has a long grey beard and black eyes. He knows that Cristal will become overwhelmed by the vision and he knows what conclusion she will come to in the end because it’s the same conclusion he came to several years ago, in the same exact way she did.

She won’t ever realize that he genuinely liked her and wanted to protect her, but this will be seen by the readers at the very end of the story. When Cristal begins to question the point of trying to be a good person, he gently ensures that she won’t veer off onto the path of apathy or rebellion by gently reminding her of her roots.

This draft is far from complete but I wanted to make this post today as a baseline. Throughout the next couple of months feel free to check-in for updates to see how I develop this story further. Happy Friday!

What to expect in 2022

Photo by Jonathan Petersson on Pexels.com

It’s been a while! I just wanted to give a quick update on what you can expect from this blog from now on. It’s safe to say I definitely experienced another episode of “writer’s block.” This time it wasn’t that I didn’t have ideas of things to write about. My busy schedule, a lot of life changes, and the pressures of having to constantly come up with new ideas all resulted in me taking a break from all of my digital platforms.

However, once it was time to come back, I was nervous that it had been too long. Then another month passed and then another and then another…

So I’m finally ripping the Band-Aid off and posting! From now on, once every other week I will post a one-hour-long podcast episode. On my Podcast, I like to give movie reviews, book reviews, comment on popular trends in literature and talk about relevant social issues that come up in the writing space.

As far as the blog you’re reading right now goes, I will post at least once a week. I will post poetry, fiction stories, tips for freelance writers, and digital marketing updates that pertain to freelance writers. I may post less, and I may post more, but you can expect a post once a week from now on at minimum.

For my Instagram account, my long-term goal is to post three times a week, but for now, I can only commit to one day a week. On my Instagram, I post poetry that you can’t find on my website and more tips for freelance writers! Over the past year, I have definitely learned the value of setting realistic goals and following through on them. Even though I’ve done a good job of following through on this in my personal life, I haven’t done such a great job when it comes to AJ’s Creative Corner.

So these are the goals for 2022, I’m very excited about a new beginning and I will see you guys next week!

Thank You.

I get labeled the “bitter” girl a lot so I thought I would try saying thank you for a change.

Thank you.

Thank you for abruptly disappearing when I finally started to venture

Don’t worry, this time I promise I will spare you the lecture.

Thank you for not opening the message we both know you’ve seen,

Thank you for the unfathomable amount of uncertainty you’ve given me.

Thank you for reminding me it’s much safer staying alone.

Thank you for re-introducing me to a lethal rejection I’ve already known.

Thank you for not showing me the wedding band you took off in your car,

Because God forbid you hadn’t, things wouldn’t have gotten this far.

Finally, thank you for labeling me as the crazy one when my back is turned,

Maybe one day I can pay you back for all the valuable lessons I’ve learned.

Thank you.

Confession

I’m afraid that I have unintentionally painted a lie,

Dressed up and celebrated in sweet short lines.

I’ve told countless renditions of our devastating goodbye,

But never once took ownership for the mistake that’s all mine.

I have a habit of hiding behind a wide innocent gaze,

So when a betrayal occurs, you’re the obvious choice to blame.

But I’m guilty of keeping secrets that will make your head spin,

Manipulate a well-meaning love into a game I want to win.

This time these lines are an obvious confession,

Not coated in honey or a victim of my selfish suppression.

I did something wrong and you never even noticed.

I did something unforgivable and it kills me to know this.

How To Shorten Your Poetry

Hey guys! I shared a video today discussing how you can make sure you’re being intentional with your poetry by adding a couple steps to your editing process. Poetry doesn’t need to be short to be good but it needs to be intentional! Feel free to comment your thoughts down below, I can’t wait to hear them!

I made sure to attach the draft I referred to throughout the video so you guys can get a feel for how I personally edit. The perfectionist in me hates uploading a draft because I want everything to be perfect but I really hope you guys are able to use this as a guide to improve your editing process.

Confinement

Fifteen reminds me of her long black hair and the splash of freckles on her skin

She’d tie her flannel shirt around her waist before we climbed the chain-link fence

I didn’t know it then, I was too petrified to indulge in a forbidden sin

It was mesmerizing, I stayed on her hook happy to live in suspense.

She had a wild heart, she had a vile mouth and I strangely lived in envy

I was playing a role she was living my truth, I didn’t know what I was feeling.

She tells stories like me but she stretches them out until the fiction becomes almost deadly

It was an unfiltered admiration, a mindless infatuation and then one day it all hit a ceiling.

I liked the parts of her that were wild and free but always kept a little sweetness

There was a wicked side but I turned a blind eye, eager to keep her on a throne in my mind

She’s gone now and I’m grateful for that but I still savor the bits and the pieces,

Because of her I’m forever freed, there’s no version of me living confined.

Baby Blue

Baby blue tastes like American Spirits and cheap liquor too,

Looking at him I know there’s nothing more I can do.

His jokes are growing stale, his laugh is the quietest in the room

Looking at him I know he’s accepted his own doom.

Baby blue is one more drink, one more mistake from fading away,

And I can’t watch him spiral anymore so he tells me that I can’t stay.

I kiss him on the cheek on his stained leather seats

Choosing to walk alone, willing to bear the Summer heat.

Baby blue has the prettiest eyes even when he’s yelling at me with anger.

I know his longest love will be his lifelong infatuation with danger,

but Baby blue thinks I’m the villain, so he’ll hate me until I’m a stranger.

Reality

When I was a little girl if I had a bad day,

I would simply close my eyes & make it all go away.

I’ve always had this special talent of disappearing into my head

Shifting reality to fit into the story I created instead.

When I opened my eyes again everything was brand new,

I wasn’t really me and you weren’t really you.

With the snap of my fingers I was an actress in a role,

I never used it to be cruel, I just used it when life was dull.

Even as an adult I make up these universes in my head

To escape the monotony, the reoccurring dread.

Every once in awhile I have this sobering, sudden fear

That I’ve slipped far into the role, that reality’s become unclear.

New York City

I have a love for New York City,

The streets are too crowded, my pictures never turned out pretty.

With every one moving so fast day to day,

No one cares what you do. No one cares what you say.

I have a love for New York City

And a troubling romance for the vodka I carried with me.

I woke up at midnight and I walked there all alone.

I always hated it there but I couldn’t go home.

With a stomach full of liquor and 50 dollars in my pocket,

I stared at a Ripley’s Believe it or Not! Mirror wondering if I’d lost it.

I have a love for New York City.

A love I visit when I’m lost, not a love I carry with me.